When I started this blog, there was a lot of soul searching taking place. I wanted to express my ideas and thoughts in this new form that seemed very enjoyable.
So far, over six months into this particular journey, I’ve enjoyed uncovering so many ideas and trying out word combinations.
Then, a certain barrier was hit. Was my writing too… saucy… at times? Was I venturing into sinful territory? unlike my other blog…where I hit a different barrier…running out of ideas…running out of good pleasant personal stories to fictionalize…
Like many other things in life, we ascribe values to categorize things easily. Some feel money is evil, others see money as a tool. In reality, money is just a concept printed on paper.
For me, the challenge was accepting the ideas coming to mind for me to write. I had this idea that things had to be designed to uplift the reader to become a better person. Anything short of that was just adding to the noise of the internet.
Today, I write many uplifting things to share on social media and on a blogging platform. But, I also enjoy playing in the romance arena… hence this very blog right here.
The internal conflict is not yet resolved. I still press on, because I do really enjoy writing. However, my own view of what I’m writing needs to continue to shift and grow.
The very existence of this blog is pushing me well and far outside my comfort zone. I’m now uncovering things I love and enjoy that I didn’t know about before. (five years ago, telling me I’d be writing this much would have been extremely hilarious to me).
Even telling friends what I write is a challenge. I’m not known as a writer in the offline world. I’m many things else, but not a writer.
Why share this about myself?
The label that a man writing romance is sinful is laughable. However, that is my struggle. I’ve got so much momentum built resisting this very genre that the discovery that I enjoy writing it… catch me in a few more months and I’ll let you know how that has concluded itself.
The embrace of this genre however has liberated my creativity in many other areas that I was blocked in. I’m not sinning by thinking about things that is naturally happens to humans. I can direct my thinking in ways that is beneficial. I don’t have to allow any sort of thought, but I don’t have to block my thoughts either.
I also know what it is like to wonder about a topic and not knowing who to turn to and ask for help. I know how it is to be told that it is not proper or correct to have natural thoughts. I don’t want any reader to feel boxed in. Your thoughts are just that.
How you value your thoughts is a matter entirely differently. Some thoughts have evil outcomes and others have good outcomes. Some can be controlled, others can’t. But I won’t digress. That’s not my focus today.
This time of year, many think hard about their weaknesses and strengths. Many have forgotten their new year’s goals. Others are trying to start a fresh new beginning in time for the Spring and Summer season.
Take the time to go a bit easier on yourself. Get to love and understand yourself better. That’s what’s keeping me going with my writing discoveries. We are constantly growing, changing, adjusting. The process itself is not sinful outcomes will vary however.
As I continue my journey of self-acceptance… enjoy the evolution of this blog into whatever it will become.