Introducing a new segment to the site. Motivation Monday or Motivational Monday. The idea was tried in one form on another blog. Then, the idea came after a conversation with someone on social media. Why not do such a segment here. It’s a new concept that is worth trying. Hopefully, readers will like it. With a bit of luck, it will be a weekly thing eventually. So. For the new year, here is the first push.
The Habit of Building Romance
We all have habits. We all have things we want to change. We all have goals. We all have resolutions of some kind. Most of them are focused on the individual. Few ever focus on the relationship. Well, not in any popular way anyway. Sitcoms won’t joke about setting up goals for romance.
Romance is assumed to be automatic. It’s either you click or you don’t. If romance is not working, then it’s time to bail… because the other person didn’t do their part. (few ever think they’re the cause of a romantic failure…)
Today, let’s look at the whole purpose of romance from a different vantage. One can get very intentional about being romantic. So much so that it can be a science as much as an art. Romance is not this mythical unicorn that happens when two people feel butterflies. Romance is the science and art of conveying how appreciated a partner is.
For some, it’s flowers at random times of the day or year. For others, it’s a box of chocolate for the sake of just being sweet.
very intentional play on words, thank you.
The majority of time, romance is just being thoughtful. That usually happens when a person puts their partner’s needs on their radar… on purpose. Life keeps everyone super busy and focused on their own needs. The survival of the fittest. Looking out for number one.
Romance requires the purposeful keeping of one’s partner’s needs top of mind. Setting out to do for one’s partner, without being asked.
How does that happen?
The habit of romance is not achieved overnight. It requires a few tips and tricks. It takes levels of skills to get really good. It starts with the purpose of being romantic in order to serve one’s partner. Not… repeat… not to get something in return. This is just doing for the sake of doing.
Sadly, the social convention says that guys are not very good at this. So, to keep with some of convention, we’ll talk about it from a guy’s point of view today.
To get the average Joe to be romantic, he usually needs incentives. Like, he’s trying to get the girl or he’s trying to make up for messing up with the girl. Once these two objectives are met, such average Joe wants to focus on his needs and getting what he wants. It’s just typical.
The above average guy will not be like Joe. He won’t turn up the heat just to get the girl and then fade. He understands the need to keep the gal. He understands the art of being a gentleman. He has to keep giving and keep chasing the gal. Even if she’s committed to him and loyal.
To get to that level, one has to use all the tools available to get good at being romantic. Let’s start with the phone.