What of my feelings? How does that play into respect of women?
Great question. I am like most men who try hard to respect women. I don’t really know. Not that I’m ignorant of what needs to be, but I don’t know how that works out when the person you’re with is not build like you’re built… emotionally that is.
Let me explain myself
I like a woman with curves on her frame. What then do I do if my woman doesn’t have curves on her frame? I know what I like. I know what I’m attracted to. I also know that I can’t let superficial feelings dictate who I am to marry. Yet, if my heart loves a skinny woman for her mind and character, what happens to my physical desire for curves?
Herein lies the rub again
I am privileged by gender to even hold this concept for consideration. I can easily get away with recommending she puts on weight. The whole societal engine will back me up… without my consent… and push her towards feeling inadequate if she doesn’t pack on more curves.
That is really not fair. No matter which way you slice it. To force someone to change their very nature just so fleeting feelings can be satisfied…is that not some kind of crime?
I do prefer a C cup, but never will I ask my lady to downsize to make me happy. I don’t have to live with the cost of a knife altering my personal sanctuary which is my body. It’s to easy to throw about wishes and commands when you’re not paying for the cost of implementation.
I don’t have to worry about damaging my health by starving my frame to fit into a dress that is way too small and probably won’t be worn again after that vacation trip or wedding event.
We Say Respect Woman; check those feelings
The same way we taught our boys to want big breasts, then told them they were wrong, now they must chase big rear ends… we can teach our boys that feelings are fine and don’t all need addressing. Blasphemy!! yes it sounds blasphemous… but very true
It’s true. We can chose to respect women once and for all. We used to respect them in prior civilizations. We used to honor them as warriors just like ourselves. We used to value them as equals in all pursuits. That is until we got dumb and allowed the dark ages to horribly mess with our minds. (dramatical over simplification and alteration of historical facts for the sake of making a point)
Women, by nature, will nurture those they love. Don’t worry, she knows what you like. And she’ll do her best in her time to make you happy. Provided you’re willing to do your best to make her happy too. (author’s note… that concept needs to be dissected another time… as no one is responsible for the happiness of someone else… just the willing participation in augmenting the happiness they’re creating for themselves)
The value of authenticity
In all this talk about respect, let’s teach our boys to better understand their emotions. They’re not limited to the famed three of anger, frustration, and fight. All ego sensitive and stunting of a man’s fullest worth.
The key to having men respect women is to have men respect their own feelings to begin with. Own your feelings. Then, let your mind decide your course of action. Sure, it’s easier to just cat call, but the mind knows it’s not cool. Work it out. Step up your game. Save the compliments for a lady who will appreciate it, not a random stranger who will find it creepy.
When women feel respected, they blossom and bloom into the ladies that they are. Assuming that the respect is mutual of course. Thankfully, women are strong by design. They do not need our approval to blossom. They don’t need us to be great. They don’t need us to be their best selves. They don’t need us to feel pretty.
Just ask any major body of knowledge… you’ll find out that most women dress up for themselves or their girlfriends well before they dress up for the man they’ve selected to be with. So fellas, don’t be a jerk and cast yourself into the friend zone. Respect women.
But the feelings though…
Yes… it’s nuts when the body sees what it likes and wants to chase… and you’ve got to put on the brakes and act civilized.
Think of it this way. If you keep running out of your cave to chase whatever hottie you see, you’re leaving your cave unattended, and you have not done the due diligence of reconnaissance to know if she’s not backed up by a band of warrior brothers. Or, you’ve not found out if her man has a sniper on standby to take you out. Or you’ve not found out if she’s a trained lion tamer who can just whistle and have bears and lions devour you before you’re able to get back to the safety of your cave.
But the feelings though… it does feel great to chase… it feels great to look and want. However, those feelings shift and change. Have a little respect to pick a course and follow instead of changing at every whim that catches your fancy.
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