The Love Calendar
It had taken Eddie a few long days to sort out all the information he knew about his relationship and what Nadine wanted. He had taken his time to get deep into what had worked and didn’t. The revelations were a bit painful to digest. The facts didn’t lie, he was a bit of a jerk.
This was all about to change. He was going to use his strengths to help his weaknesses.
Eddie knew how to plan for work. He worked on projects all the time. Making complexity sensible was his gift. Also, he enjoyed challenges that had clear defined benchmarks to work towards. Now that he knew his lady worked the same way, this made the stakes even more challenging and enjoyable.
Keeping a schedule was another of his strengths he was very proud of, yet also most sad about. He knew how to keep up with all his work demands but never once thought of making his love life a priority on his calendar. That, it turns out, was the key to saving his relationship
Not having a plan, a direction, a purpose with tangible steps bored Eddie. His relationship, surprisingly, was boring him. He didn’t feel needed and felt without purpose. OK, that was a stretch. He felt that having the sole purpose of keeping Nadine happy was not a purpose he could subscribe to.
The biggest weakness Eddie had however was staying focused on things that were important but not urgent. Work was always urgent. Life seemed important but not critically urgent, so things kept getting put off or done half baked. That was the problem ruining his love life. He thought that by saying he loved Nadine he had checked off the right to-do list item and was good to go.
Change is incremental
The plan was to now use his scheduling skills to map out a plan for the year to improve his evidence of love for Nadine. It had taken some time to draft. Now his calendar was synced across all devices with notifications and alerts. Everything that was important to Nadine had been scheduled in.
The random spa treatment date was booked already. The random word of kindness was booked. The dates that would blow her away were already scheduled. He had placed plenty of research time to better understand her plans, her aspirations, and find ways to add value to her about her interests. He even had booked a few hours here and there to be available to shop, as she had predictable big shopping days where his lack of interest made her very angry with him.
There were other moments planned to be empty. Why? Because there were things you couldn’t plan for. Things she’d come up with that needed his time. He needed a few days blocked out as catchup days for whatever was disrupted by the random moments that caught Nadine’s fancy.
What was this?
Nadine noticed a few calendar invites pop up from Eddie. This was different. He had taken time to actually listen to what she had to say that time they sat down for brunch. This could be interesting. Keeping her hopes tamed, she accepted the invitations. The man had planned sufficiently far enough in advance that she’d not forget the invite and wouldn’t be booked already. That was very thoughtful. Now, to not forget his own schedule would be charming.
Eddie smiled. The plans were falling into place. Now, to make sure the plans weren’t too predictable or strictly set so that they lose their charm…