A Strain Over a Drain of Pain

Just Trying To Help

2017-04-10 14.31.28

Douglas on his part was not the kind of man who thought of himself as having a massive ego. He was just trying to help his lady grow and be the best version of herself that she could be. Sadly, whenever he made any decision, it just annoyed his precious beautifully wife.

While generally a quiet man, Douglas couldn’t seem to tap into his pleaser side of his personality with Amber. No amount of Yes Dears seemed to do anything to satisfy her. Somehow, the very nature of his ability to please women was insulting to her intelligence or something or the other.

Douglas wasn’t sure what the problem was. He had a whole crew of lady friends who enjoyed his counsel and found great success in love because of his advice. The few guys who looked him up for advice generally found his helpfulness pivotal in their success with their own women.

This further puzzled Douglas. Nothing he tried at home worked with his lady. There was just no winning with her. It had to always be done her way and only her way for her to be satisfied. Everything he brought up as original got shot down quick. He felt a bit insecure from all that barrage of put-downs.

The more he talked to her about this problem, the more it threw doubt in his own abilities to come up with good ideas. Something had changed during their honeymoon and he couldn’t put a finger on it.

Right now, his concern was that his wife didn’t value him or his input. She was taking charge of the relationship without his consent. Or did he ever have any moment when he really was in charge? Why did he feel they had to clarify who was in charge anyway?

The need to draw a line in the sand was starting to get very desperate. If he couldn’t solve this problem, their marriage would grind to a halt before it had time to flourish or produce any offspring.

Douglas was feeling all manners of pain internally that he wanted to flush down the drain. As far as he could tell, once that was handled, the strain that was causing pain would go away and their love would prosper just fine afterward.

How then, Douglas wondered, do you approach a woman who automatically discounts your ideas, thoughts, pains, and worries as irrelevant based solely on the fact you’re a male? This would prove to be the most critical answer of all for him.

While looking for an answer, Douglas found himself drifting ever more dangerously to the dark side of his personality. The side that grew darkly quiet and eerily tactical in fighting back. This mean that when he got upset, he’d bring out the big guns and really go all out to make himself heard and understood.

To his frustration, the harder he fought to be heard, the more Amber grew adept at avoiding him, dismissing him, resisting him, and outright outmaneuvering him for her own victory.

Douglas was seeing the relationship ending sooner than later and he felt entirely helpless to fix it. Worse, Amber thought he was nuts and being unnecessarily pessimistic and looking to end an otherwise perfectly good relationship. If only he could stop being a pain in her rear, all would be well.

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